Something to know:
“Not everyone is energized by social interaction in the same way. For some, connecting with others can feel like work rather than play, and it requires patience and understanding from more outgoing individuals.” - Quiet Revolution, 2018
Something to remember:
When you’re naturally outgoing, connecting with people who are more reserved can be a rewarding challenge! Introverts often thrive in one-on-one or small group settings, and they appreciate thoughtful, genuine interactions. Approaching these connections with sensitivity and respect for their boundaries can help bridge the gap between different social styles.
So, how can you, as an outgoing person, make meaningful connections with introverted people?
Start by taking a step back and tuning into their cues. Instead of jumping into a conversation, ease in by making simple gestures—like a warm smile, a friendly “hello,” or a small comment about the setting. Giving space for response without rushing is key. When a conversation does begin, avoid overwhelming them with high-energy questions or rapid-fire topics. Ask open-ended questions that allow them to share in their own time, and be genuinely present in listening. Over time, these smaller moments of connection can build comfort and trust (Cain, 2019).
Something to share:
“A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.” - Bernard Meltzer
Share these 3 ways to connect with introverts with other outgoing friends…
- Start small and casual: Keep initial interactions light—greeting them with a smile, or commenting on a shared experience (Cain, 2019).
- Practice patience and let the conversation breathe: Allow pauses in conversation to give them space to respond and feel comfortable (Quiet Revolution, 2018).
- Show genuine curiosity: Introverts often appreciate meaningful connections. Ask open-ended questions that let them share in their own time (Laney, 2021).
Something to do:
Introvert Connection Challenge: At your next social event, engage someone who seems reserved with a simple greeting or compliment. Offer a relaxed conversation starter and see where it leads.
Sources
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Cain, S. Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking. Broadway Books, 2019.
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Quiet Revolution. “How to Connect with an Introvert.” Quiet Revolution, 2018. Quiet Revolution
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Laney, M. O. The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World. Workman Publishing, 2021.